parenting101

I'm just wondering if anyone has any experience with getting pregnant after stopping Depo Provera. I know the statistics say it can take any where from 3 months to 2 years, but I have to believe it can happen sooner since if you miss your two week window by even a day they make you take a pregnancy test before giving you the shot.

I was on Depo prior to getting pregnant the first time, but since that time we didn't have a clear time frame on when we wanted to get pregnant, they had me switch to Micronor (basically the pill form of Depo) for a while since it doesn't take as long to clear your system. I was off Depo for about 7 months and off the Micronor for 3 weeks when I got pregnant last time.

We're just hoping for a short time frame since there is a very high possibility that my husband will be going overseas in the near future. We also don't want a huge age gap between the kids. Our daughter will be 2 in August so there will already be 3 years between them.

I didn't want to use the Micronor this time because I didn't like the emotional side effects it caused last time. I also don't have many options when it comes to birth control. I have to stick to the progesterone only kinds because of my migraines. So I'm hoping things will work out ok. The end of my two week window is the 1st so in theory the Depo should be out of my system by the 2nd. I'm just not sure if that's really how it works.

Any thoughts/tips/advice are welcome!

My son was diagnosed with a speech delay and sensory seeking behavior. He has lately placed out of speech and PT ( He is still in ST and PT at the moment but come the summer he will no longer need it ). My son has some anger issues. Anytime we ask him to do something ( ie clean his room, dinner time, pick something up, time for bed etc ) he will either kick or punch what ever is around him. Usually the wall. The other night when I told him that it was time for bed he decided to yell and scream at me and then punched me in the face. When I asked him why he does it his answer is "because". I have tried punishment, time outs, etc and nothing seems to work. Is this something that should be brought up to one of his therapists or is it normal? It seems like he only does this at home, I haven't heard anything from his teachers. Advice? I am at a total loss.

X-posted.

i was orginally going to post this to clothdiapering and maybe i still will as i have some more specific questions for them, but i think i'm more likely to get a wider range of unbiased answers here, so here we go...

i am in a process of somewhat reluctantly switching from disposable diapers to cloth, or maybe just introducing cloth diapers for part time use?  at this point i'm experimenting and not committing to anything.  before dd was born, i was determined to do cloth, and then it turned out that the supposedly one-size diapers i had purchased did not fit her (and they still don't seem to, at 6 m/o), plus they were extremely bulky and 100% polyester (not breathable).  it really turned me off, plus i felt bad about having spent all this money on something i'm not going to use, and i just happily moved on with the disposables.

what made me want to give cloth another chance were the explosive poop outs happening on a daily basis, sometimes more than once.  so i bought some bummis prefolds, 100% organic cotton.  they seem great, but i'm still concerned.  together with the cover, they still create quite a bit of bulk and i'm concerned about my daughter's comfort.  how does it feel to have all this fabric around your bum?  and doesn't she get hot, especially now in the summer?  the lady in the diaper store told me that there was a study that demonstrated that the inside of a disposable diaper is warmer by three degrees than the inside of a cloth diaper.  i just took it in at the time, as i was a bit overwhelmed, but now i'm wondering...  does it depend which cloth/disposable diaper?  does it include the cover which obviously contributes to the heat?  we had no issues with the pure and natural huggies (other than the poop outs, of course).  i even tried putting a diaper cover on top of her disposable diaper before the daily poop out, and that works well, but doesn't it make her even hotter? 

we are also at the point where we are trying to figure out if she can sit unsupported (she can but only for a couple of seconds), and i can't help wondering if all this bulk in the diaper is making it more difficult.

also, she was never one of those babies fussing over a wet diaper - not that i would take advantage of it, i check her diaper very frequently, and this morning she was in wet cloth and was crying...  it broke my heart.  and, of course, cloth diapers are more difficult to just "check".

i still feel a strong pull towards cloth diapering, but i have so many doubts...  mostly about my daughter's comfort.  any words of advice, experience or encouragement would be great.

also, if you dealt with those explosive poop outs with an exclusively breastfed baby, did you find that there was a significant change when you introduced solids?  we will be starting solids when she is sitting unassisted, which will likely be soon, but we will be doing it very slowly, the blw way, so i wonder if it will even make a difference for a while...

I'm pretty much a single mom (husband is home once a month for a few days due to his job.) My daughter is in daycare all day (10 hrs) 5 days a week. I am unsure how to balance everything on the weekends when we are running around doing errands and relaxing - trying to squeeze in play time with cleaning and laundry and feeding/diapering can be hard. I play with her and try to involve her in everything I do, I just can't help but feel a little guilty not devoting every second I have with her. Any advice?

Why do I feel like I am setting his entire academic future by picking a preschool?

( A tale of two preschools )

My genius baby, Ethan is 5 1/2 months.  He's a genius.  Just kidding.

However, Ethan can roll from his back to front (and is an exclusive tummy sleeper) but not back.  When did your kiddos learn this skill?  How did you help them do so?  He tolerates tummy time for like 5 minutes before getting angry.  I tried today letting him be angry and work on ideas to roll over.  He was sort of miserable.

Ethan's only managed a few of the front to back turns, usually by stuffing his hands under his body and sandwiching himself onto his side.  See?  Genius.  I never would have thought of this?!

ETA:  I'd not be concerned, except he now wakes up soley because he's stranded on his belly in bed :)

Secondly, I took him in to the Dr. two days ago because for a week or so he had been, well, not himself?  He was lethargic, and about 30 minutes after a nap, he was ready for another... just generally low energy.  The dr on call, not our regular Ped (whom I want to carry in my pocket all the time cause she is ZOMG fabulous) was an ass.  He wasn't kind, friendly, didn't ask clear questions and got frustrated with me when I didn't answer them correctly.  He left us waiting in the little room for 15 minutes and then told us he had been checking his email.  He then told us that he'd like to do a blood draw just in case, and then wasn't clear about where we needed to go to do this (leaving us waiting in the room for another 15 minutes or so?)  We then were promised to have the results by the end of the day (by him) at 4:55, we called back because we hadn't heard and they left a message for the dr, who called us back 3 minutes later with the results (obviously he had them, and forgot to call???!!!) 

So, how do I best address how frustrating an experience this was, and to whom?  Do we wait a couple of weeks until our 6 month and talk to our regular ped who shares an office with him?

My daughter is a new 3, her birthday is in March. She just went to the dentist for the first time (no flames please, I get it, there's nothing to be done about it now) and they found four cavities. Three of them are mild, and they said they can be left alone and watched, but one of them is moderate and is causing her pain.

They said that because she was so good for the exam, they would like to try to fill the cavity. They would not be willing to put her to sleep, they would just use a little laughing gas and maybe a shot of novacaine. (MAYBE?!?!?!?! WTF IS MAYBE?!?!?!?!?)

I have huge huge huge dental issues and its one of the reasons I haven't brought her in before now, even though I have had some concerns about her teeth. During the appointment, I was able to control my anxiety and only had one very short little panic attack, right when they were using the metal scraper to "count" her teeth (I swear to God they were cleaning/scraping) and the sound, OMG the sound. (Just as an aside, I swear I did not let on that I was freaking out. My kids don't know I'm afraid of the dentist and I am trying hard to keep it that way because I don't want to pass my fears down to them. I was careful to control my face while I was freaking out and the only way you'd know is if you'd had me hooked up to a pulse reader)

Anyway, so my issues are, in no particular order:

* They plan to strap the laughing gas to her face. I hate this idea. I hate laughing gas. I am fine with her trying it, I know it helps people and many people love it. However, when it is used for laboring women, they hold the mask to their face themselves, so that they can't possibly get overdosed, because if they get dizzy or lightheaded, their hand will fall and they breathe regular air again. I remember having laughing gas at the dentist as a child and I felt scared and lost and out of my body and I could hear people kind of but why weren't they helping me? I wanted it off, but I couldn't articulate that or move my arms or anything. I was MUCH older than 3. Needless to say, I don't want my daughter to feel this fear.

* When we had the cleaning appointment, they cleaned her teeth with a regular toothbrush instead of with the buzzy polisher because she was only 3. So of course she was good, it was just a toothbrush! How does it make sense that she is too young for a polisher but old enough to have fillings done while she is awake. (With MAYBE a shot of novacaine, omg this maybe thing is haunting my dreams.) I've met my daughter, and I expect that if they get near her with a drill she is going to freak the fuck out.

* What if they start drilling and can't finish? I asked if this had ever happened before, and props to the dentist for her honesty, she said it has. Three is the youngest they will do a filling at all with an awake child, and she said a few have been good, many have hung in there, and a few panicked so badly they weren't able to finish. If this happens after the drilling has started, they will have to hold her down to fill it quickly. It will look terrible, but at least the pain will be gone. The idea of holding my daughter down at the dentist has my heart beating through my chest as I type. I don't think I could. But, before anyone says that I shouldn't go, (trust me, I've thought of this) I don't like that either. I was with my son when he was circumsized (wouldn't do it again) because I feel like I owe it to my children to be there and support them if they have to go through awful things. If its too hard for me to watch, and I'm an ADULT, how is it fair of me to ask them to go through it? ALONE? UM, no. I will not add a sense of abandonment and betrayal to the list of things to cry about.

* If the cavity is not filled, (after all the dentist can recommend, but she can't make the decision, it is not her child) then she insisted that my daughter be cut off of juice completely except at meals and that her teeth need to be brushed after every meal. Honestly, doing that for the next 2 to 3 years would probably be more traumatic to her than the filling. At least in the long run.

She is quite articulate and I asked her what her preference was, just to see what she'd say, and of course her answer was no to cutting off the juice and also no to having her teeth fixed. Of course.

HELP?

I've always been a big reader- one of my favorite places and smells is the used book store or a library. I love to read. I hope to pass that love on to our children. Our only child so far is almost 17 months. I've been reading to him before nap and bedtime for a long time now and sometimes other books during the day.  I read pretty much only baby and toddler books- almost all board books. But how do I get my rowdy son to be nice to the books? To me, seeing him continually bend the cardboard pages and covers is almost physically painful. It's like a vegan being forced to watch cows being slaughtered- it's horrible. And it drives me absolutely nuts that he flips the pages all over the book while I'm trying to read. We'll be on one page and he'll pry my hands off and flip back a couple pages, then flip forward a handful of pages- gah!! But I know he LIKES books. He'll carry them over to me and hand them to me so I'll read to him, but once I start, he starts flipping the pages and trying to bend them. What do I do to teach him to be respectful of books, and to maybe sit through even half the book without having to hold it way out of his reach so he doesn't damage it or flip all around the book? 

Please note, my son is VERY strong, especially his grip. 

Thanks in advance!

I don't really have anywhere else to ask this, so I'm really hoping someone here can help.

I'm in the process of getting child support from my daughters father. He's currently in graduate school and therefore doesn't make a lot of money. I know that he is set to graduate sometime within the next year. However, the two of us do not speak at all, and I have no way of finding out when he does graduate. This is pertinent because he already has a job lined up as soon as he graduates with the same people he works for now - only his salary will obviously be adjusted. In terms of wanting to modify the support order once he does graduate, is there any way for me to find out when that is? I don't have a lawyer and I can't really afford one. Do Universities publish graduates anywhere? I assume if I called the university they wouldn't be able to give me any information, but I'm not sure what I'm suppose to do in this situation.

I really don't want to wait two years until they automatically modify the order.

I'd appreciate any help!

Is there something like a baby swing for bigger/older babies? My 5 (almost 6) month old has stopped being able to nap since we stopped putting him in his swing (it's too dangerous now that he's figured out how to sit up in it). He used to be able to sleep for at least 1.5 hours in the swing (sometimes longer). It was also very easy to transfer him and then put the swing in motion. Now that we can no longer use it, he wakes up immediately. Part of the problem is that he gets very gassy when I nurse him to sleep, and when we lay him flat, he wakes up to burp and then never goes back to sleep. When I am occasionally able to transfer him to a flat surface (his crib or our bed), he wakes up within half an hour. As a result, he doesn't nap very well (if at all), and is tired and grumpy by the end of the day. He sleeps well at night when it's quiet and dark, but even if I pull the blinds during the day, he wakes up.

Is there any sort of baby swing or motorized cradle type thing for bigger infants? He's pretty heavy (around 17 lbs), so it would have to be something with a higher weight limit that could last for a while. It would also be helpful if it was something he couldn't pull himself up on, although I doubt something like that exists for safety reasons.

Alternatively, any good tips for transferring a sleeping baby during the day?

Today, I successfully put my three year old daughter in a timeout while we were driving. During which time she was firmly secured in her carseat (rear-facing, Britax, of course).

My husband does not appreciate this SuperMom moment so I am forced to turn to wiser pastures, like parenting101.

What awesome parenting moments have you enjoyed lately?

Ok, I know, I know, potty training has been done to death but I need some help! I have a 3 1/2 year old who has been super resistant to potty training. She is dry for the majority of the day, and has the other signs of readiness other than the want. We went diaper free on Monday and had great days with some accidents. However, it is increasingly getting frustrating as I don't think she knows before she goes. If I have her go to the potty frequently she will pee on the potty but if I leave it up to her she will start to go and the run to the potty leaving a trail of pee behind her. How do you get them to understand how to hold it or feel when they need to go? My sanity and floor thank you in advance.

I'm in the process of making a slow transition to using cloth diapers, at least part-time.  One of my hesitations was the fact that I found poo stains so hard to wash out of anything - so imagine doing it on a daily basis with diapers!  But then, one wise woman enlightened me about the need to use cloth diaper safe detergent.  So I bought a bottle of Kind.  Now my question is - can I use it on poo-stained clothes and sheets, both mine and the babies?  I mean, I'm sure it will wash them well, but my guess would be that it's not as gentle as baby soaps, and we both have very sensitive skin and get irritated easily.  I have used baby detergents for my own clothes for years, even pre-baby, and I have never used anything else with her.  Should I give Kind a try?

My 11 week old was sleeping pretty well - only waking up once to feed from 7a-6p. He sleeps swaddled in the miracle blanket. Well, all of a sudden, he has started escaping from it and waking up several times a night. He's really strong and it just won't contain him anymore. Any suggestions? He was able to break out of the velcro ones at birth, and we've tried the woombie, but something about it seems to really bother him. He is still pretty flail-y so I'm not sure he's ready for a sleep sack yet, but maybe he's telling me it's time?

I have a question about teeth, my fifteen month old only has four teeth, by this time my first was working on her molars.  So when do I worry about her teeth not coming in?  Who should I talk to the dentist or the pediatrician?