What the hell do you do with a defiant 3 year old that isn't beating them? Because omg I'm about to kill her. She's fighting us on everything at every step of the way. We've done yelling, time outs, taking away toys, and none of it's getting through to her. Today's her birthday party, and while I"m sitting on the toilet she walks up with all of her crayons, and dumps them at my feet, then walks away. I tell her she needs to clean them up, she refuses. So now she has no crayons and is in her room for the rest of the morning, and I don't think she cares. I'm not gonna cancel her party solely because it will disappoint all her friends, but what the hell else can I do to teach her that being an inconsiderate little shit who enjoys making life hard for everyone else is completely unacceptable.