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Parenting 101

A Beginner Course in Creative Parenting


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Bad timing...
opaloctober wrote in parenting101
Grrrreeeeaaaatttt....just had to drop my classes due to pregnancy complications. I'm 30 weeks along in a high risk pregnancy, 2cm dialated, on procardia for preterm contractions, on strict bedrest the next 2 weeksa at least, until I see my OB again, and just had a cerclage (sp??) placed on Monday. I also have a 19 month old baby girl to chase around. I'm so totally crushed. And since my due date (Jan 18) is the exact same day that Spring semester classes begin (and my induction date is the week of Jan 10th)...I have to wait until summer to resume classes. Poo I just feel like crying. FWIW, I was taking 9 hours (3 classes), one Tuesday-Thursday math class, and 2 fully online classes. My main concern is the campus classes. I plan to have the same schedule when I return to school nomatter where I go. There is a junior college about 30 min away from my school that offers late start classes. Those classes start Feb 11. I could take those, but i'm worried it will still be too soon after having the baby. For you student mommas out there, how long did you wait to return to class??

I was on maternity leave and tried to juggle one class while taking care of my newborn full-time while minding my other two when they were not in preschool or school. It was too much. To keep up with the class I would have been short changing my brief solo time with the new baby.

I advise that you wait until summer.

Edit: It is probably too late now, but I expect you could have taken an incomplete on this semester's classes and finished them next semester. It might be more realistic than jumping into new classes with a newborn.

Edited at 2012-11-07 10:13 pm (UTC)

It's not too late to ask for an incomplete. She just needs to talk to her professors.

Yeah, this far into the semester, I'd definitely look into taking an incomplete if you can. Then you'd have all of next semester to finish what little is left of this semester's work...which would be a lot less than taking any new classes, and not put to waste all the work you've already done this semester toward your degree. Medical reasons, like illness or pregnancy are exactly what incompletes are for.

(Deleted comment)
They're only little for such a short time. I know it's disappointing to have your plans change, but I think you'd be better to try for Summer.

My third baby was due in the mid-year break when I was studying post-grad, but she ended up waiting until the first week of semester to be born. Ugh. I was taking 2 classes, but both were fully online. It still sucked - I passed, but didn't do nearly as well as I am capable of doing.

why can't you take your online courses if you're in bed?
stress?

Absolutely! LOL My stress level is nearly through the roof, with having DD running around while i'm all by myself (hubby works a most days), and the mental state i'm in from being frazzled about the pregnancy have my brain too fried to concentrate anyway. I could wait until hubby gets home at night to do some work, but by the time he gets home (which is no set time, btw) i'm way too worn out to attempt anything, sadly :(

I started taking online classes two months after my second was born. It wasn't bad, but I had to do most of my work after my toddler went to sleep.

Babies are only babies for such a short time... but educating yourself is a lifelong venture. I'd say take a deep breath, let out the frustration, then let it go for now. You can only do what you can do.

I took one class the semester my first son was born (I am in a PhD portion, too, so the work load might be a different type than your workload). The semester started when he was almost 3 weeks old. I had class one night a week and, honestly....it was fine. Great even, a good break for me! I did breastfeed so I took my pump with me to class and pumped on our break.

When my second was born (he's now 6 months), my first was 20.5 months, so just about the same space as you. I was done with courses by then, so I can't advise you on two. Of course it will be more difficult! With my second, it would be super difficult because he won't take a bottle. So that would be a complication! :)

And I'm super sorry about the complications. I would definitely talk to the professor of your on campus class to see if there is anything you can do -- either an incomplete or doing work on your own. Perhaps you could skype in. (I'm not sure about what you're doing with your online classes, but it's worth reaching out to those professors as well. Definitely keep them informed.)

I had my son at the end of May. That was really good timing because I had 2 or 3 weeks after classes ended to prepare for him, and I took the summer off and started up again in August.

Mine was born at the end of May. I planned on taking the summer off, but went stir crazy and signed up for a class in the second summer semester. So I was off about 6 weeks, tops.
And talk to your professors about incompletes. Good luck!

Mine was born in January, I resumed school in late August.

Could you explain to your professors what's up and ask if you can finish the class virtually? Unless they're la classes, you might be surprised at how flexible and understand they can (or can't, lol) be. Then set aside a few hours during the week while your husband entertains the older child? You might feel less "unfinished" if you can get the classes done without an incomplete, and more ready to take the spring semester off.

or have your mom or another family member or friend watch your toddler while you get some classwork done? it's a good, productive way to endure bedrest anyways.

I had my second child in the middle of my first semester of getting my MBA. I took my midterm before I checked in the hospital, had the baby the next day and missed two class sessions and returned two weeks later. My Prof was super supportive as was my husband which helped a lot!

Both of my boys (in 4th and 2nd grade now!) were born when I was in university. My oldest was due in early February-- I took the semester off and realized I should have done at least a couple online classes or something. My second was due around Xmas-- I went back in January and it was fine; I was a senior and took 2 online classes and 2 classes on campus.

I just did the exact same thing as you. I had complications, although not as extreme as yours, and had to drop my classes. I am due Jan 15th and thought about the winter classes as well. I think it will be too much stress and can cause supply issues due to the stress. I'm waiting until the summer. So, that would be my opinion.

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