30 Day

parenting101


Parenting 101

A Beginner Course in Creative Parenting


Previous Entry Add to Memories Share Next Entry
Older kid potty issues
Happy the clam
trappedinhead wrote in parenting101
My son just turned 6. He still has regular daytime pee accidents (night, too, but I'm less worried about that). He has never been consistently dry for more than a couple of weeks. It was averaging once a week or so (but, again, could sometimes go a couple of weeks), but for the past few weeks, it's been daily. Sometimes multiple times a day. He says he doesn't know when he needs to go. He's in KIndergarten and has had accidents at school twice now. He just doesn't go all day while he's there. I've tried basically everything there is to try. I just ordered a vibrating alarm watch for school, but it's not here yet. His pediatrician says it's not a concern until he's 7, but I really don't want him to have to go through a year of embarrassment and smelling like pee. He doesn't need one more thing making it harder to make friends. He is developmentally on track in most other areas. He's extremely advanced intellectually, actually. We're having him evaluated for some sensory/behavior issues next month (possibly Asperger's or Sensory Processing Disorder), and the ped said to wait and talk to them about the potty issue. But it seems to me (and most of my Dr. Google research agrees) that it would make more sense to identify or rule out any medical causes FIRST, and then look at behavioral causes. Has anyone else dealt with this? Any advice? Commiseration? Light at the end of the tunnel stories? I plan to schedule an appointment with the ped & hand him what I've seen about tests, etc. that can be done, but I'm just extremely frustrated. 

I'd ask the doctor to test for a UTI which sometimes can contribute to incontinence. I'd talk with his teacher, too, and see if regular trips to the bathroom can be scheduled (say, every two hours?) In our local school system, all the children are taken to the bathroom before snack (10 AM)and before lunch (12 noon).

They did test for UTI once, quite a while ago. It was negative. My guess is it's not that, since it's been an ongoing problem. But I will ask them to check again, since it's been more frequent. I do plan to talk to the teacher about it. Parent-teacher conferences this week. There is a bathroom in the classroom, so they don't do regular breaks. He says he doesn't like the one in the classroom, though. He did go during lunch today, so that's an improvement!

He shouldn't be going all day without peeing. Work with the teacher to set up designated pee breaks for him.

I'd change dr's if you're concerned get a second opinion please.

I'm seriously considering it. I thought I'd give him one more chance. Thanks!

Seconding that! Also, to get a second opinion you don't need to completely switch doctors... just get a second opinion from someone else, maybe a ped urologist even, and only decide whether to switch or not afterwards. If you don't like the second doctor, you can always stay with the first after all.

I do plan on asking for a referral to a urologist if the Dr. still won't address the issue. Also, when he's not at school, he has an adult reminding him about every 2 hours. Sometimes he'll go, sometimes he'll argue. Sometimes he'll go on his own without the reminder. Hopefully the watch will help keep that happening at school. If he actually goes when it tells him to...

I would definitely try to exclude any physical reasons, but for the time being, it would be ideal to encourage him to go every XY hours, or every major break or whatever, in case he's really not feeling or misinterpreting the urge of a full bladder. Maybe if he has trouble with remembering (although the watch sounds good), a teacher could remind him?

coming in from another point of view here. my son is autistic and has sid(sensory processing disorder just like me, his dad, and his sister) and toilet training was hell. he was still in pull ups at 6 when he was in kindergarten and it was about january of his kindy year that things clicked and he finally started going. one of the big issues for him was how loud the toilet was, so one thing they did for him was got him a pair of special ear coverings that reduced sound. the other thing was that they(finally) after a lot of work on my part started using a time timer- instead of being a timer that goes off and makes noise, it shows visually how much time is left in a red area that gets smaller until the set amount time is gone. by keeping the home and school routines absolutely the same, it worked. i hope something here helps you!

It could be something like that. He hates automatic flushing toilets and toilets that are loud (he will use them if I cover the sensor or his ears the entire time). We've tried headphones and earmuffs for other things-that might help. I know we need to work on keeping our routine the same everywhere in general, but it's hard when he only has school 2-3 days/week!

You are viewing parenting101