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Toddler choice battles

My 2.5 year old will request thing A. Then I make a move to give him thing A and he changes his mind to thing B. Then I try to make a move to thing B but no, he wants thing A.

I know he's a toddler, I know it's a phase. But how do you handle this one? I have a tendency to tell him I'm going to give him one of those things (A or B, usually what he's said last) and then we're going to stick with it. It does not go over well.

3-year-old... teething?

okay, so it started out looking like a spoiled child: waking up at night and demanding to go downstairs for a snack and a cartoon. I even gave a piece of my righteous mind to my husband for enabling (he was the one hanging out with her in the middle of the night). then it progressed into runny nose, and again, we kind of brushed it off. I mean, what 3-year-old never had a runny nose? raise your hands last night, she woke up, called out to "papa" and when he came, she felt... warm. not burning hot, but a little warmer than usual. he took her temp: 98.4 - 98.8 (temporal, we normally take it twice, once per side of her forehead). she was all whiny and grumpy and ended up falling asleep in our bed. in the morning, the temp was still around 98.6, and since it was way under 100.1, she was sent to daycare. between waking up and leaving, she picked up a bad fight with me about... everything: dressing, shoes, brushing teeth and hair, potty... so far, no one called to ask me to come get her, but the day's still young.
my husband explained to the director that our daughter is feeling crabby, sleepless night, slightly elevated temperature, and all that. the director asked if she could be teething.
she had her 3-year checkup. all 20 teeth are out. I have no idea when the next ones should come.
question is, is it even possible? the symptoms fit teething like a glove, but at 3?..
did any of you have that? I'm dumbstruck.


Birthday party invitation: proper wording

Hello. I am throwing a pool party for my child who turned 7. At this children's age most parents drop off their children at parties. However I know from previous party experience that not all children are able to quickly change their clothes and might need a parent to help. I would like to state that parents can stay (but are not obliged to). What would be the proper wording?
Parents are welcome to join the splash?
Parents are welcome to stay and splash?
Hope to see your entire family?

My three year old can't make up his mind

For the last couple of weeks my three year old has exceeded the patience levels of my husband and myself. I am the first to admit that I don't have a lot of patience to begin with, but my husband has the patience of a saint and if he has hit his limit, that tells me that things are pretty bad.

For example, this morning we went to Home Depot and he told me he wanted to wear his apron. Put it on. He starting screaming bloody murder that he wanted it off. Took it off. Started screaming bloody murder he wanted it on. (At which point I refused to put it back on.) We ended up having to leave because he had a huge meltdown. He does this with EVERYTHING. He wants shoes, no he doesn't, he wants sandals, no he wants his shoes.

After about a week my husband and I identified that he has been doing this with EVERYTHING, so we put a stop to it. (or tried too). He asks for sneakers. He put his sneakers on. He pitches a fit that he wants sandals. Too bad. Your sneakers are on your feet and they are staying.

We thought that by putting our foot down it would solve our issues. It hasn't. If anything things have gotten worse.

I'm absolutely at the end of my rope. His behavior HAS to change. I just have no idea what we're supposed to do. Like I said, my husband has the patience of a saint and even he refuses to take our son anywhere at this point.

Toddler bed

When did you switch from a crib to a toddler bed?

Advice? Tips? Should have waited? Should have done earlier? Thanks!!

Face painting

We went to the outdoor shopping mall last Thursday, and there was a party there we didn't know about. Among other things, there was a girl there painting faces for free. Unfortunately, we came a little too late, and she was about done. My 3-year-old had a huge meltdown about not having her face painted.
Today, we went to the zoo and ran into another face painting booth. To paint one eye cost us $10. Which is fine if it's done once in a blue moon... but now, my daughter demands the face painting all the time. (Can't blame her: she looks really darn cute with it.)
My question is, does anyone know a good tutorial on face painting and maybe a good brand of paints that can be used on kids' faces? One thing to consider is, I cannot draw a friggin' daisy for my life, and I hate drawing to begin with (ah, the things we do in the name of motherhood).
I promise to not turn this into a profitable business to rip parents off. This is strictly for home use.

Dealing with a night owl pre schooler

Background, we have a normal bedtime routine it has been our routine for Years and works very well with DD1 and seemed to work for DD2 until recently. She's 4.5 and isn't falling asleep until nearly 11 even on days when I have to get her up by 7:30 and we have a full day. I've tried the quiet in your bed etc. It doesn't work for her. She has recently started kicking the wall randomly in the middle of the night and also, if I have her in bed by 8 gets up 6-7 times before 11 to "go potty" (pretty sure this is because the ONLY reason to get out of bed after bedtime in our house is to go potty).

We have had a big change in our house recently (my brother in law moved in with us) but the night owl behavior started before this.

I'm not a night owl, I routinely wake up around 5:30, I'm getting tired of not having the 2 hours of time between my girls bedtime and when I go to bed for snuggles with my hubby, so..any ideas? Any other early birds dealing with a night owl child?
(Side note hubby is a night owl and only wakes up at 8 to ge!tready!for work because he has to.)


Night time potty training

My daughter is 4 and still uses pull ips at night. She still wets her pull up during the night. Do I wait till she starts having dry pull ups before seitching to panties at night? Or just make the switch now?

Scheduling a birthday party

I'm looking for opinions here.  We are planning on having my daughter's 3rd party on a Sunday in a couple of weeks, but can't decide on the time.  Almost all of the invitees are 3-4, parents are invited to stay, and we don't mind feeding them properly.  If you were the parent of one of the guests, what time would suit you best?  We are thinking 11am - 1pm, but maybe that is weird?


UTI? Something else? Paranoid mom?

My 3 year old was fine all day yesterday and out of nowhere around 7pm last night (while she was on the potty) started shrieking that her bum hurt. She wouldn't sit on the potty anymore, wouldn't poop or pee and wouldn't even sit down. She was extremely upset. I checked her out and didn't see any irritation. She fell asleep although we had a very restless night. This morning she peed fine, no complaints. I sent her to daycare and called to check up. They said she pooped and peed, no complaints, and had come in from outside several times to pee. This evening after we got home, she did mention a couple times that her bum hurt, but she did pee and poop fine (her poop was fairly big and hard). She is going to pee about every half hour which seems to be more than normal for her. So do you think she has a UTI? Constipated? I mean she pooped twice. Her pediatrician closed a half day early before I could call them today for advice and the local convenient care closes in an hour and I am so undecided on whether or not to take her. Yes, I am paranoid. But I just don't want another sleepless night. TIA for your input.

Protective bike gear for infant

I'm looking at getting a bike this year. I have a 6 month old baby that I'd like/have to bring along when I go for a ride. I know of those jogging strollers that you can hitch to the bike but I can't currently afford both the stroller and my bike, so I was looking at those baby seats you attach to the back of the bike.

My questions are - do I need to buy protective gear for the baby? And do you use one of those seats and can recommend a specific brand/type?


I have two children, 9-year-old boy and 4-year-old girl, and their father and I aren't together anymore. In the last couple years our son has spent the majority of the summer with him; would come home for the "vacations" we had planned, and then go back. Their dad wants to have our daughter now for a lot of the summer and I feel like she's too young for that, not to mention she's a COMPLETE momma's girl. Whenever they're set to go for a weekend, she never wants to. She's fine when she gets there but after a while is like okay, I wanna go back to mom now. What are your thoughts on the appropriate age for this??

Books for kids

... or Help Me with School Again Please.

So, the assignment is to find at least 3 books appropriate for children age 0 to 8 on the given topics. All I need is the name of the book and author (I will find the rest of information for bibliography myself).

Here are the topics:

  1. Cultural or linguistic group identity

  2. Gender Identity

  3. Children with Special Needs

  4. Separation/Divorce/Remarriage/Blended Families

  5. Phases of the cycle of life from human reproduction to death

  6. If you have any other important topic in mind, please, shoot at me.

I have until June 14 to complete it, and meanwhile I will sit on my ass waiting for your ideas look through the books I got from the family I used to work for and see if I find something interesting there (and we got a bunch).

Thank you in advance.


Cord Blood Banking

I'm asking for a friend who has herself in a bit of a panic about cord blood.

Has anyone done cord blood banking and been able to wait until the cord stopped pulsing? Were you told you had to clamp it immediately, and if so - do you think it affected the health of your baby in any way?


This got long! Background stuff.Collapse )

Basically, when my daughter turns 2 in late November there is a program she can join at the school she will likely be attending. From what I understand, it's just a day care that you can put your kid in for half a day. I think you can put them in all week, but at the moment my husband wants her to start one afternoon a week. I've sort of agreed to it, but I'm not really sure there's any real need. I've never left her with strangers because I haven't had to, and I'm not really keen on doing it for no real reason. She is perfectly happy being away from me, she has "friends" at her playgroups, and I have "mommy friends" that we do play dates with. I don't really understand my husband (and his family's) insistence that she needs this.

I think I've always just thought that the longer a kid could be taken care of by family, the better. My husband's family seems to be the opposite - the sooner you can get the kid out of the house, the better. And I don't mean that in a negative way, just that they think kids and parents are better off when kids go for out of home care.

I guess I just want to hear what other people have done and what others think. Am I weird for not wanting her to go to a day care? Is it important that she be away from family?


My 19 month old daughter has a bad temper. In the last month or so she's started to get quite upset when she can't get her own way. This is a normal reaction and a normal phase that kids go through. However, when she gets angry she bites. She will try to bite me and if I move her so that she can't get to the place she's trying to bite, she will try to bite somewhere else. She's try two or three times before finally biting herself, and as soon as she's done it, it seems that her tension just disappears.

When she loses her shit like this, I just talk to her calmly and try and hold her enough that she won't hurt herself, but not too much to piss her off further. I sometimes start singing to her, and that calms her down quite quickly usually.

But what I'm doing is just helping the immediate tantrum, it isn't helping the overall problem. I don't even know if there is a problem? Will she grow out of this? Will it get worse? Should I nip it in the bud? How should I do that? She can't talk so I can't have a conversation with her to try and resolve things. Will this frustration go away when she can say more? Or will it get worse?


It's been about 5-6weeks now that my daughter is with sitters - first for us. One day a week with a friend from preschool - it's aplaydate feel. Two days of week she's with just asitter. She's, the sitter, been amazing. We are all happy. It has though been exhausting for her, this new change in life and has been a true champ.

This past Thursday, daughter (almost 5years old) was probably exhausted and something triggered and she had a full meltdown on their way home from playground with sitter. She calmed down but at home something else triggered and it ended with daughter hitting the sitter.

Daughter completely denies this. Says sitter was mean and she never wants to see her again. The sitter shared in front of daughter what happened, at that time my kid never argued the story.

The triggers were, sitter asking daughter to use politeness when asking for something (she wanted something from her bag that sitter was helping to carry). And second one that led to greet hitting was she got home, grabbed a snack from shelf and was eating. She has food allergies and sitter wanted to make sure what she was eating was ok.

Since this is the first time we are experiencing this, am at a loss on what to do!  Help.

Sleeping gone

16 month old normally sleeps 12 hours a night with 3 hour nap from 12-3 every day.

Went on vacation for THREE days. She refused to sleep  at night and during the day.

Normal bed time is 630-7. Today we drive the three hours home starting at noon. She slept most of the way. Had dinner, bath, books and then absolute melt down. Melt. Down.

Actually...more closely to a panic attack. She did this while on vacation.

What can I do? Why is she freaking out? I get her freaking out at the hotel but now we're home. And before this she would sleep in her pack and play ANYWHERE.

Advice? What can I do to calm her down?

Eta...We let her cry it out for 15 minutes and she's asleep. After two hours of rocking, putting down, reading, putting down, cry it out then go in after five minutes and increasing time etc. Am I going to have to do that every night now? Do you think she just needs time to adjust? Will it cause more harm than good to let het flip her shit? She threw full blown temper tantrum...banging head...I've never ever seen her do this.

Also...Baby sitter is grandma and she constantly tells me how she never lets Beau play alone. Jokingly says "oh well we are in her face all day playing, I'm sure she wears you out when you're with her".....I'm wondering if we're seeing parenting styles clash? We want to put her in full time school type environment with other kids and more structure...is this my clue to make that jump? The free childcare thing is pretty awesome.

ETA ETA as of 730 5/11...she cried for 30 seconds at nap time and slept 2.5 hours and tonight she went to bed with NO issues! Back to normal! Thank you for the advice, it'll be good to have for the future!!
I am once again here to glean knowledge from you wise parents! I appreciate your kind advice in my last post about my headstrong 3 year old. The situation bringing me here today is this: My daughter (3) started daycare yesterday. She did GREAT. (I was the one in tears!) She had been in desperate need of social interaction so this is a good thing for her. She made it through day 1 accident free. Today when I picked her up, she had apparently had two wet accidents. We potty trained about 6 months ago, went straight from diapers to undies. She does have accidents throughout the day most days, (always pee, she has never had a poop accident) usually due to being too engrossed in playing or being too stubborn to stop and go! Occasionally she will wet a little at nap or bedtime but she usually does good through those. We have tried a sticker chart for accidents but it meant nothing to her.

So on her backpack with her dirty clothes was a note, "Please bring Pull Ups for Sylvia for nap". And the teacher explained to me about her accidents. I said I would replace her change of clothes (I had literally sent like 3 pairs of pants and 4 undies just in case) and we went home, and my daughter started telling me about how she wore a diaper today, which Im guessing means someone put a Pull Up on her at some point. I was about to call my husband to stop and get some Pull Ups but I thought I'd come here for opinions first. I really don't want to do Pull Ups just out of personal preference. I tried telling my daughter it wasn't a diaper she wore but she wasn't convinced and I definitely don't want her thinking she is wearing one of those.

I have worked in childcare and I know it's a pain when a child has an accident. But if they are going to be changing a Pull Up anyway, whats the difference? I don't want to be the jerk parent right off the bat but I don't want to be the doormat either (which, honestly, is what I usually am). So, opinions, please!

Cloth Diapers & Potty Training

We need some advice about next steps as we think about potty training our cloth diapered toddler. We've been using bumgenius all-in-ones for the last two years and loved them. Daycare has asked us to think about transitioning her to pull-ups. So I have a few questions:
1. Did you find pull-ups necessary, or were you able to transition your child straight to underwear by waiting until they were ready
2. If you did use pull-ups, can you offer advice about pull-ups v. training pants and brands you recommend?
3. If you did get cloth pull-ups and/or training pants, how many pairs did you need? (We've made it two years with 24 diapers, the thought of buying another 24 pairs for just a couple of months seems annoying!)



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